I just accomplished my childhood dream of becoming an author, but my mom will not be able to read my book. You see my mom never went to school — not even grade one — so she can’t read well. Because of this, she never hovered over my homework and didn’t even know I applied to medical school when I was 19. My mom parented me (and my four siblings) simply with what she felt in her gut was right for her kids and family.
Dolphin Parenting describes the concept of following the intuition and taking decisions accordingly, as every individual have answers within them to every situation they need to tackle.
Like most parents of her generation and those that came before her, my mom raised her children by looking and listening to her parental intuition. As a psychiatrist, medical director and co-founder of Dolphin POD methodology, who has worked with thousands of kids and families over 10 years, I have seen first-hand how modern day parents are fast losing that knowledge gifted to us by nature.
Today’s trend of over-parenting is seriously under-preparing our children for a rapidly changing and ultra-competitive 21st century by interfering with their self-motivation and ability to adapt.Dolphin POD life skills program prepares the kids for the 21st century by enhancing their cognitive, emotional and social abilities.
Dolphin moms are balanced and collaborative. They are not over-controlling, overbearing tiger mom. Nor they are permissive, directionless jellyfish mom. They are the balance of these extremes and was firm yet flexible. They have rules and expectations — including clearly expecting us to do well in academics with respectful behavior. Yet, they also value the freedom to be kids, individual passions, and independent choices.
Dolphin moms do not overschedule. Dolphin moms do not over-instruct. They let their kids learn to play freely and vigorously. It was not until I became an expert on the science of self-motivation, did I realize the awesome power of play. Play is directly linked to the development of our brain’s powerful prefrontal cortex and helps a child develop vital social, intellectual, and emotional skills that cannot be acquired from any other activity and that is the reason why Play is an integral part of the POD philosophy.
Dolphin moms do not over-protect. They create a pod of support. My mom made sure I knew that connection and contribution is the centerpiece of our human culture. Dolphin moms encourage their children to bond to others in a meaningful way. This forms essential social skills, character, values, and a sense of community for themselves and their children. Dolphin moms adapt. They constantly adapted to her changing kids and their changing environment.
Dolphin moms have the highest of expectations for their kids. They expect their kids to do well in school but more importantly, to do well in life. They expect their kids to be independent yet fully connected to family and community. They expect kids to live a healthy life of balance, meaning, and purpose.
My mom was not my academic tutor who hovered over my homework nor was she my personal assistant, slave, or slave driver. As a dolphin mom; she guided me, not directed me. She encouraged me, not instructed me. She let me play freely but also had rules and responsibilities for me. She didn’t teach me math or spelling but she taught me values, role modelled balanced living and showed me the power of a pod.
As a mom of three myself, I have learned more about parenting from my mom than from my 15 years of academic training, my 12 years of clinical practice, and from all the books and blogs that I read. So although my mom will wait for the audio version of my book, The Dolphin Way: A Parent’s Guide to Raising Healthy, Happy, and Motivated Kids Without Turning Into a Tiger to come out, she doesn’t really need to as she has lived The Dolphin Way her whole life.